Our convictions can only be as strong as the questions we ask.
I’ve been in places where questions got me shamed, assaulted, and destroyed. Our platforms of social media, church, politics, and campuses might seem open-minded and willing to dialogue, but if you move against the status quo, you’re likely to be called a heretic, sinner, apostate, or ridiculous. Most places will stomp out dissension and cancel you if you mess up a single time. We can play the game of “we are a safe place,” but conflict always shows our true selves.
I’ve been guilty of this, too. I don’t like asking uncomfortable questions, or being challenged with ideas I’ve never heard, or assuming that my precious ideas are too narrow and naive, when really my own ideas have never evolved. I’ve shut down disagreeable opinions not because the content was unsound, but because I was comfortable where I was. God forgive me for covering my ears to a better version of life.
If you’re in a place that won’t ask questions and always reject what you ask, then 1) you might be called to shake the status quo, or 2) it’s time to leave.
I want beliefs that have been strengthened by skepticism, that have gone through the crucible of confrontation, experience, and a choir that doesn’t always echo each other. I want truth that will keep me through darkness. I need a faith full of doubt to make it through the hardest valley. I want resilience born of grit and growth.
Anonymous asked a question
Is it unwise to share your doubts with non christians? I don’t think we should make christianity look like you can’t come to Jesus unless you get fixed first bc we should come as we are so He can work and idk that not sharing our doubts with them helps to accomplish that. At the same time what if sharing doubts increases nonbelievers doubts or grievances about God or Christianity?
Hey dear friend, I think it’s not only wise to share your doubts out loud, but it’s imperative that we do so.
We need to ask questions. We need to be open to new ideas. We need our faith deconstructed and challenged once in a while. We all have a particular “box” of faith, and it needs to be under constant renovation. A stale faith will bring about cults, or will rely too much on spoon-feeding, or will never endure the worst trials of our lives.
The thing is, questions will come. Doubts will come. Pain will come. And faith that stays in the same box for years is the kind of faith that eventually collapses under the weight of our denial.
Yes, a few people might take your doubts out of context and say, “Yeah, that’s why I don’t believe that stuff.” That’s fine. Most likely they were going to say that anyway, and you’re not responsible for that person’s journey either.
In my experience, every single person that I’ve shared my doubts with has been receptive. Their response is always, “You too? Thank God.”
I can’t trust someone who has a thriving robust faith all the time. I’m thankful for them. They show me who I want to be. But I find myself unable to talk with them about the harder times or the weirder Bible stuff. They’re always telling me to just “Trust God.” And I’m not there a lot. To be truthful, I’m not there most of the time.
Continue reading “I Have Doubts: Am I Allowed to Say That?”