“3 Ways Accountability Will Change Your Life”


Here’s an article I wrote that’s been published on X3Church, called:

“3 Ways Accountability Will Change Your Life.”

It’s about the uncomfortable, brutally surgical confrontation of accountability and its necessary benefits for growth and life.

Here’s an excerpt:

You’re ready to quit your addiction.

You’re ready to be teachable, to be under leadership and mentoring.

You’re ready to own your problem and get the help you need.

You’re ready for accountability.

All this sounds romantic, but accountability is a deliberate confrontation with yourself through another person—and confrontation is hard. It’s even harder when you begin to see the depth of your own issues and all the ugliness inside, the things you were happy to ignore before you decided to recover. We’re so much more entrenched in our habits than we think, so accustomed to “the way things were” that our bodies will desperately claw back to our old destructive ways.

Recovery is a street-fight, and our darker side will never fight fair.

Read the full post here. My book on quitting porn is here.
J.S.

Blame, Accountability, and Addiction


Here’s an article I wrote that’s been published on X3Church, called:

“3 Ways to Stop Blaming Others and Finally Own Your Porn Problem.”

It’s about letting go of blame and receiving accountability for destructive habits, including porn and other addictions. It’s also centered around a talk by author and researcher Brené Brown.

Here’s an excerpt:

Our instant defense mechanism when something goes wrong is to say, “Tag, you’re it.” Our egos are constantly trying to protect us from feeling wrong, because we associate this with being unloved or unaccepted. All this makes a logical sort of sense, but it’s dangerous, because our initial instinct is to drag others down with us. This in turn only justifies and reinforces our cycle of destruction.

We feed our bad habits with blame. This loop can go on forever. Yet if we struck down this Hydra of Blame like a whack-a-mole before it got to others or ourselves, the inner monologue might change.

Thinking this way, as Brené Brown implies, suddenly lets go of control and creates a scary uncertainty. But it also exposes our blame-game for what it is: an excuse to use, stay mad, or stay withdrawn. When blame is named, it shrivels up and loses power.


Read the full post here. My book on quitting porn is here.
J.S.


Breaking Porn Addiction and How to Quit For Good

P1020141


My book on breaking porn addiction has a brand new cover! It’s available in both paperback and e-book. It’s been recently endorsed by Craig Gross of X3Church.

This is a very short book about how I overcame a fifteen year porn addiction. I’ve now been sober for over three.  I talk about what porn does to your brain, specific steps to quit, and how you can quit for good.

I know how embarrassing it can be to talk about porn, but this book is designed for both you and to help your friend, regardless of gender or beliefs.

The paperback is only $6.99 and the e-book is 2.99! And you won’t need a Kindle, it works on everything. Be blessed and love y’all!

— J.S.

My Book On Quitting Porn: Now In Paperback!

Cutting It Off paperback


My book on quitting porn is now in paperback for only $7.29 on Amazon! It’s also been endorsed by Craig Gross of X3Church, where I’m now a contributing blogger.

It’s a short little book on my fifteen year porn addiction and how you can quit permanently, for good.

Be blessed and love y’all!

— J.S.


http://www.amazon.com/Cutting-Off-Breaking-Porn-Addiction/dp/1505350891

My Books Are On Sale!


My book on love, sex, and dating is now on sale for only 8.29 and my book on quitting porn is on sale for 5.39!

If you’ve been blessed by the books, please consider leaving a review on Amazon!

— J.S.


My New E-Book on Quitting Porn

Cutting It Off Amazon

Here’s my newest e-book on breaking porn addiction.

This is a very short e-book about how I overcame a fifteen year porn addiction. I’ve now been sober for over three.  I talk about what porn does to your brain, specific steps to quit, and how you can quit permanently, not just for a few weeks at a time but for good.

I know how embarrassing it can be to talk about porn, but this book is designed for both you and to help your friend, regardless of gender or beliefs.  This is not a Christian book disguised as self-help — the book is first and foremost a guide to quitting porn, with elements of Christian faith deeply rooted.

It’s only $2.99! And you won’t need a Kindle, it works on everything.
Be blessed and love y’all!

— J.S.


New E-Book on Quitting Porn

Cutting It Off


Here’s my newest book on breaking porn addiction!
http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00QE2M6N2

This is a very short e-book about how I overcame a fifteen year porn addiction. I’ve now been sober for over three. Whether you’re helping a friend or struggling yourself, regardless of gender or faith, this is how to quit porn: not just for weeks at a time, but for good.

Only $2.99! And you won’t need a Kindle, it works on everything.
Be blessed and love y’all!
— J.S.


How’s Your Life After Porn Addiction? And Is There Any Hope To Find a Lust-Free Man?

speaktenderly asked a question:

Since your porn addiction and recovery, do you have freedom in the way you see women now? Are you still affected by objectifying thoughts? I ask as I am a woman, discouraged at the state of men. Just recently a very godly man attempted to push boundaries with me – and it honestly broke my heart. Can you make sense of how men and lust works? Can someone love you and in the next moment hurt you because of being led by lust? Then he claimed it was because he wanted to be close? I need truth.

Hey there my friend, thank you for your honesty, and I’m really sorry about what you just went through.  I know that broken trust is one of the most hurtful things that can happen.

What happened to you is absolutely dead wrong.  If a man goes against your consent, that is completely done and over.  No sympathy, no pity, no pampering.  He cannot rationalize his way out of this one.  You can forgive him, but you don’t ever have to be his friend or anything else.

Inevitably though: Any man that you meet today, no matter how good and godly, will struggle with lust in a lifelong battle of both internal and external turbulence, and while some are better at it than others, you’ll definitely be engaging to fight that battle together.  This goes for women, too, because illegitimate lust is not specific to gender.

About a hundred years ago, most of the sensual lewd images of that day would’ve been bare feet or maybe an ankle bone.  Imagine a bunch of dudes with mustaches and monocles looking at a picture saying, “Unfh, dat ankle.”  I’m being dumb here, but only a few generations before us, we weren’t bombarded with so many visual lures.

I say this knowing that 1) the human heart has always been twisted, and 2) we can’t blame external stimuli for our internal troubles.  But the pervasive access to pornography has certainly heightened our sexual dysfunction, and there’s no doubt that we live in a much more sexualized culture than ever before.  And the US is not even the most sexually “free” nation.  So all this is an uphill reality that needs a new arsenal.

Continue reading “How’s Your Life After Porn Addiction? And Is There Any Hope To Find a Lust-Free Man?”