How Do I Talk About God with Someone Who Doesn’t Want to?

Anonymous asked a question:

What do you do if every time you bring up God in a conversation someone changes the subject?

Hey dear friend, I would say: Let them. Be kind and let them.

That doesn’t mean you never talk about your faith around that person. But my guess is that

1) the topic of God is painful for that person,

2) the topic of God is repulsive for that person,

3) it is not entirely relevant for that person, or

4) I say this with much love, but maybe the manner in which faith is brought up has not been gentle or understanding.

You cannot force someone to talk about something they don’t want to. I’m not saying you’re doing that. But if they’re changing the subject and your goal is to “bring them back to God” all the time, you’re coercing that person into a subject that they obviously don’t want to discuss.

A Christian’s goal is never to transmit information until another person is persuaded. That’s a very westernized way of evangelism. It assumes that a “threshold of theological knowledge” is what makes a Christian. Modern church evangelism is a memorized checklist of systematic facts, and it seems that once you can recite those facts, this must mean you’re close to God. This, of course, is not true.

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I Have Doubts: Am I Allowed to Say That?

Anonymous asked a question

Is it unwise to share your doubts with non christians? I don’t think we should make christianity look like you can’t come to Jesus unless you get fixed first bc we should come as we are so He can work and idk that not sharing our doubts with them helps to accomplish that. At the same time what if sharing doubts increases nonbelievers doubts or grievances about God or Christianity?

Hey dear friend, I think it’s not only wise to share your doubts out loud, but it’s imperative that we do so.

We need to ask questions. We need to be open to new ideas. We need our faith deconstructed and challenged once in a while. We all have a particular “box” of faith, and it needs to be under constant renovation. A stale faith will bring about cults, or will rely too much on spoon-feeding, or will never endure the worst trials of our lives.

The thing is, questions will come. Doubts will come. Pain will come. And faith that stays in the same box for years is the kind of faith that eventually collapses under the weight of our denial.

Yes, a few people might take your doubts out of context and say, “Yeah, that’s why I don’t believe that stuff.” That’s fine. Most likely they were going to say that anyway, and you’re not responsible for that person’s journey either.

In my experience, every single person that I’ve shared my doubts with has been receptive. Their response is always, “You too? Thank God.”

I can’t trust someone who has a thriving robust faith all the time. I’m thankful for them. They show me who I want to be. But I find myself unable to talk with them about the harder times or the weirder Bible stuff. They’re always telling me to just “Trust God.” And I’m not there a lot. To be truthful, I’m not there most of the time.

Continue reading “I Have Doubts: Am I Allowed to Say That?”