Ugly Asian Male: On Being the Least Attractive Guy in the Room



Statistically, I’m the least attractive person in the dating scene. Alongside black women, the Asian-American male is considered the most ugly and undesirable person in the room.

Take it from Steve Harvey, who won’t eat what he can’t pronounce:

“‘Excuse me, do you like Asian men?’ No thank you. I don’t even like Chinese food. It don’t stay with you no time. I don’t eat what I can’t pronounce.’”

Eddie Huang, creator of the groundbreaking Asian-American sitcom Fresh Off the Boat, responded to Steve Harvey in The New York Times:

“[Every] Asian-American man knows what the dominant culture has to say about us. We count good, we bow well, we are technologically proficient, we’re naturally subordinate, our male anatomy is the size of a thumb drive and we could never in a thousand millenniums be a threat to steal your girl.”

Asian-American men, like me, know the score. That is, we don’t count at all.

Hollywood won’t bank on me. Think: When was the last time you saw an Asian male kiss a non-Asian female in a movie or TV show? Or when was the last time an Asian-American male was the desired person in a romantic comedy? And more specifically, when where they not Kung Fu practitioners or computer geniuses? I can only think of two examples: Steven Yeun as Glenn from The Walking Dead and John Cho as Harold from Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle. So it takes either a zombie apocalypse or the munchies to see a fully breathing Asian male lead, or a Photoshop campaign #StarringJohnCho for an Asian protagonist with actual thoughts in his head.

It’s so rare to see a three-dimensional Asian male character, with actual hopes and dreams, that Steven Yeun remarks in GQ Magazine:

GQ Magazine: When you look back on your long tenure on The Walking Dead, what makes you proudest?

Steven Yeun: Honestly, the privilege that I had to play an Asian-American character that didn’t have to apologize at all for being Asian, or even acknowledge that he was Asian. Obviously, you’re going to address it. It’s real. It’s a thing. I am Asian, and Glenn is Asian. But I was very honored to be able to play somebody that showed multiple sides, and showed depth, and showed a way to relate to everyone. It was quite an honor, in that regard. This didn’t exist when I was a kid. I didn’t get to see Glenn. I didn’t get to see a fully formed Asian-American person on my television, where you could say, “That dude just belongs here.” Kids, growing up now, can see this show and see a face that they recognize. And go, “Oh my god. That’s my face too.”

Growing up, I never had that, either. I can’t help but think of this scene from the biopic, Dragon: The Bruce Lee Story, in which Bruce Lee watches the controversial Asian stereotype played by Mickey Rooney in Breakfast at Tiffany’s to a theater filled with derisive laughter. This moment with Bruce Lee is most likely fictional, but the weight of it is not lost on us:

This was a powerful moment for me as a kid, because I grew up with the same sort of mocking laughter, whether it was watching Short Round in Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom with my white neighbors, or being assailed by the Bruce Lee wail in the local grocery store. I knew they were laughing at me, and not with.

“But hey wait!”—I’m told, with fervent knowing, “I know some Asian guys who are hot!” and I’m pointed to an infamous Buzzfeed list that shows “the hottest Asian men who will prove you wrong about Asian men,” with zero irony. Yes, I’ve seen the list. And yes, they’re like I expected: hard-rock glistening abs that are impossible for the working Asian dad, with classically European, chiseled faces and surgically-lifted eyes. More than that, it plays into the same creepy objectification of Asians as sexual play-toys.

Perhaps even worse than the portrayal of Asian men is how they’re not. More often, an acting role becomes “whitewashed” to suit a global audience, or an Anglo-American is the audience-avatar as a safety net for box office returns (remember, the last samurai in The Last Samurai was white).

I know this is a shrill, ill-discussed subject with all kinds of variables, but from the prosthetic slanted eyes in Cloud Atlas to race-bleaching in Ghost in the Shell to the the “Yellow Peril” demonizing of Asian males as evil ninjas and drug dealers in Daredevil and Iron Fist, Asian-Americans—especially males, as females can still literally serve as co-stars—are vastly both mis- and under-represented. We’re used for a footnote joke at the Academy Awards (the same year that there was a campaign called #OscarsSoWhite), an overly loud insane person in raunchy comedies like The Hangover or Saving Silverman, or a “funny foreigners” punchline in the falsely interpreted romantic comedy, 500 Days of Summer.

One of the obvious reasons that Asian-Americans are sidelined in the mainstream is because there’s no money in it. It’s that simple. Freddie Wong, in his parody video of Ghost in the Shell casting Scarlett Johansson, says it best:

“Because, as a studio executive, the immorality of whitewashing a beloved work of Japanese culture is outweighed by my fear that audiences won’t want to watch a movie starring an Asian woman. And I don’t have the balls to take that risk. Besides, whatever political outrage this decision evokes doesn’t materially effect how much money I make.”

In other words, we’re stuck in a Catch-22. There can be no roles for an Asian-American unless it guarantees a profit, but since we’re not portrayed regularly in most media, there’s never a chance for Asian-American leads to draw a profit in the first place. I get the bottom line here, and I’m not so oblivious to consider that investors are all idealistic innovators. The creative risk is too daring. From an executive’s point of view, I can almost painfully understand.

So besides whitewashing an entirely Asian property, the next best thing is to throw in a scrap of representation by using the whole stereotype.  Make the Asian guy the smartest or the martial artist, and there’s your token diversity. It’s why major Hollywood blockbusters have now made shoehorned references to China: because they’re a huge source of box office revenue, and a pandering shout-out to China, no matter how forced or unoriginal, will mean more ticket sales. (It’s even going the other way, with Chinese movies like The Great Wall casting a white role to get more sales in America.)

Yet these roles have little nuance and only serve to further someone else’s plot. I’m the Manic Pixie Dream Girl and the Magical Negro, rolled into a non-threatening sidekick or the meditative Zen master. I will never be the action star or the romantic lead. God forbid that an Asian-American male would ever win against a non-Asian.

In some cases, Asians have capitalized on their own mockery by making fun of themselves in minstrel-like deprecation. I was surprised to find that the first winner of Last Comic Standing was a Vietnamese-American named Dat Phan, until I saw his routine, which went for the lowest hanging fruit possible. If you can’t beat the laughter, why not become the jester? Even other Asians want in on their own sabotage. Representation for the Asian-American only seems to happen when it aims for the least common denominator.

The cheapest move, of course, is to completely hijack the “exotic quaintness” of Asian culture without going “fully Asian.” Our culture is pillaged to boost a pseudo-masculinity. It’s easy: throw in Chinese tattoos or an Asian-type mysticism, and the non-Asian character instantly gains credibility. You can make up an Asian-sounding name, like “David Wong,” actual name Jason Pargin, a white author at Cracked.com, or Michael Derrick Hudson, a white poet who uses the pen name “Yi-Fen Chou,” and watch the doors open. All the benefits, none of the fuss. Use my name without the actual struggle.

Of course, Asian-Americans are accused of allowing such undercover racism in the mainstream because we’re silent, passive, and obedient. We’re easy targets. We don’t typically march or cause disruption. We’re not socially involved. It’s why a huge clothing company like Abercrombie & Fitch can make shirts with Asian stereotypes like “Two Wongs Can Make It White.” It’s why Stephen Colbert (whom I love, by the way), can get away with non-apologies when he cracks yet another Asian joke. It’s why Ryo Oyamada, a 24 year old Japanese college student, can get run over by a police car in New York, and the officer goes free and no one chants in the streets.

If you replaced the race with any other, the response would be louder, with solidarity on every side. Asian? No one cares. Literally and statistically, no one cares. Worst of all, it appears that Asians don’t care, either. It’s always a surprise when we speak up. You can drag an Asian-American off an airplane, and the most noise you’ll hear from other Asians is that they just don’t want to be seen as noisy and displeasing. 


The thing is, there are no shortage of Asian-American men who are physically and intellectually desirable, who could portray themselves as fully living beings with compelling stories and relatable conflicts. Is it possible that the mainstream, for all its talk about diversity, is afraid of encountering a man who is both Asian-American and attractive? Is it simply intolerable to witness an Asian-American switch lanes between the sidekick and the star? Has the Asian-American male been permanently imprinted as comic relief or Karate expert? Is it too culturally explosive to pair an Asian-American male with a non-Asian female? Can we really handle an Asian alpha male who gets the girl at the end? (Much less a non-Asian female lead get an Asian guy at the end?)

I have to admit that some of this is on us. No, I don’t mean that we brought it on ourselves. I would never, ever perpetuate blaming the victim. I mean that we can still fight against the pervasive, seemingly impermeable walls around the identity of the Asian male, by reaching and demanding for more challenging roles in every sphere of media. The shift in perception of the Asian-American male coincides with a shift in self-perception. 

Is it also possible to take a creative risk without guarantees? I know today’s market is less likely to pave new ground, with its risk-averse eye on sequels and reboots and recycling the same tale, but I wonder how we can tell new tales without resorting to the cheapest, easiest cliches, without exploiting Asian culture for “mystical credibility” but celebrating its uniqueness with a thoughtful exploration of both its treasures and its trials.

I’ll leave you with a quote from Lewis Tan, the half-Asian-American actor who was rejected for the role of Iron Fist. In a recent interview, he says:

“I’ve turned down a couple roles. My agents will tell you when I first signed with them, I turned down the first three or four things that came up. I’ve just turned down roles that were super-stereotypically Asian that I didn’t feel represented me and I didn’t want to do. Not to necessarily say they’re bad roles, but it just wasn’t me. I’m not going to do this dorky Asian accent and just play someone in the background. That’s not why I’m here to act. I’m here to represent and to make stories that I believe in and to achieve new things in the industry.”


J.S. Park

58 thoughts on “Ugly Asian Male: On Being the Least Attractive Guy in the Room

    1. “When was the last time you saw an Asian male kiss a non-Asian female in a movie or TV show? ”

      Spoiler alert:
      My first thought is of the end of the movie “The Replacement Killers.” I wanted the two characters, John Lee & Met Coburn, to kiss soo badly. They seemed to have such chemistry. But that doesn’t answer your question.

      The last time I recall an actual romantic relationship like you describe was in the series “Rising Son.” (early 199 0s, I think). Russel Wong’s character had a long-term relationship with a fellow musician who was Caucasian (Keri Russell, I think). Of course, they were both extraordinarily gorgeous. Anyway, they did more than kiss on screen (**fans self**). It was a good series, IMO, about two Chinese immigrants (brothers) trying to find a life and love, and overcome the contention in their relationship to each other.

      The first Asian-American performer who I recall noticing was George Takei as Sulu on classic Star Trek. I can’t forgot his performance in “The Naked Time.”

      I hope things change. Soon. And I’m sorry that you’re between cultures. God bless you, brother.

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      1. Thank you, Jen. George Takei was fantastic as Sulu. I also wish Russell Wong had become more of a star, I really thought he could’ve been an A-lister, but maybe the world wasn’t ready for that.

        Interestingly enough, of all the romantic Disney animated films produced, the only one that hasn’t featured a kiss between the “prince” and “princess” characters is Mulan. But again, I guess American audiences weren’t ready for two Asians kissing in a Disney film (though the premise of the film itself is far more progressive than the expected outcome of two co-leads kissing).

        I’m sure there are examples to counter the whole kissing thing (as many have pointed out through my inbox), but they’re definitely the exception. I guess the main point being: there’s a de-sexualization of Asian-American men, for whatever reason, and I highly doubt that’s going to change any time soon. While I don’t think simply adding sexualization will fix the void of Asian-American depth in Hollywood, I guess the overarching hope is that Asians are more “normalized” as real people who have emotional interests.

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        1. I read through and it was an informative article. Being Asian myself I can definitely see the transparent issues of stereotyping in American media and entertainment. However, this is not some new phenomenon that only happens here. Every culture/civilization has a homogenous majority and that’s what will drive financial decisions which will ultimately effect creativity of the work if it is meant for commercial consumption.

          China, South Korea, Japan, India, etc…. makes it explicitly hard to impossible to be cast in a role if you are not with the ethnic or caste majority. If you are an immigrant/foreigner or appear as an ethnic minority you will also be typecasted as no more than a “token” persona. In most cases audience just cannot relate or overcome the race hurdle unless the role is clever or the actor is exceptional, which lets face it… is incredibly rare in commercial blockbusters or “hit” tv shows.

          So enough about the problems, trials and tribulations. Let’s talk about the progress to a solution too see more representation. It was mentioned briefly that the China is the second largest entertainment consumers in the world. That says something loudly to media and entertainment executives around the world. Hell, even creatives are salivating over the opportunity to receive foreign capital to fund their projects beyond the typical monopoly of Hollywood studios.

          Money talks… African Americans make up only 13% of the population yet they are near equally represented to whites in lead roles. Further, they dominate the American music industry in terms of talent and production. This is emergence of black media and entertainment is not only due to Protesting about inequality and misrepresentation in the industry but by investment in this market. Production companies funded by African Americans and other like minded investors to create African American media and entertainment companies. Building a niche market to produce content suitable for their audiences which eventually bleeds into the mainstream and becomes mainstream.

          The rise of China as an economic superpower has granted an opportunity for east Asian media and entertainment to extend out and have a hand in what mainstream Hollywood creates commercially for not only Chinese audiences but also for American audiences. It’s a two way street or a double edged sword when you invite these partnerships. Through sheer economic force, American media will have to reflect on its portrayal of Asian stereotypes and typecasting if they want to not just Appeal to foreign audiences but accept Financing from their government.. (all media companies in china are state run, they just don’t say it out loud).

          I think morality and ethics need to be ignored here. It’s money that runs the world. What we see and how we are told to feel and react is driven by economics not social justice.

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      1. I’ve been concerned with lack of proper representation concerning people of color, so hearing your own words and story of how that has affected you personally was really great 🙂 Basically, thanks for sharing your story and the stories of others dealing with this!

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  1. This is really interesting and very sad. I guess I would never have even thought about it (yes, I know. my white girl is showing.) But it’s definitely a stereotype that needs to be kicked in the butt, hard. Honestly, I think Asian guys are very cute! I hope that the dialogue about this issue grows and that we see a change happen as other stereotypes in Hollywood, that self-proclaimed bastion of diversity, begin to shift. Frankly, I think race issues should be placed way ahead of gender issues. Like, really? Is there not enough sex in movies to please people?! I’m glad you posted this because it’s real food for thought and something that definitely isn’t really being talked about. Also for the record, I think like 90% of white male actors are incredible unattractive, if not just downright ugly. Not sure what that’s worth, but… yeah. In my little corner of the world, the Asian exchange students are pretty much guaranteed to be cuter and have better style than the white guys. At least IMHO.

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    1. Thank you, Nina! I have to add that I think the problem might be less about “attractiveness,” since there are certainly no shortage of attractive Asian-American men. Rather the problem is in a deficit of stories about Asian-American men, whether they be classically “handsome” or not. If that Asian-American male is good-looking, that would just be the bonus! And I was given some good examples on my Facebook, which show some changing trends: https://www.facebook.com/pastorjspark/posts/1367471250034209

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    1. It probably makes you feel better about your own small dick consider that’s the only thing you can think of – dicks. I wonder how many dicks go through your head of every guy you see.

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  2. Bravo breaux on the post. I’m a whitey…and my wife is Japanese…so I’m cool and understanding (just kidding) Nah…profit and mediocrity….low-hanging fruit as you put it. Even classic Hollywood Movies that all sorts of fools (even one’s I mostly respect) are pantheonized….when they are tripe. There is not really that much difference between Casablanca and Air Bud 7 when it really comes down to it. Air Bud 7 has slightly better special effects. Casablanca does a bit better with mood…the black and white and all.

    Very well-written and your voice will not be widely heard…because it deserves to be heard. And right above my comment..you got some chucklehead fixating on small penises. Soon there will be some cyborg male enhancement procedure that only rich people can afford….they will all have mega penises. This will be your future Allie. Fuck the Jetsons…happy robots and floating cars zipping about….no, Allie….your future will be slavering over websites with rich people cybercocks. They’ll conduct metrics analysis….on appropriate and appealing vascularity….using a team of MIT, Stanford and Caltech, etc. grads…per the stereotype…many possibly Asian. You will be provided access to these websites during your many work breaks at a job in the fake economy….they will do away with cubicles because they want you to feel less lumpenprole….it increases your productivity as a consumer if you harbor delusions that you are just as sexy….or better yet…have the potential to become just as sexy as the people in the cyborg genital-enhancement gossip sites. panem et circenses…motherfucker.

    So I digress somewhat…but I did want to attempt to provide an answer to Allie. In a roundabout way, Comrade Allie….. I certainly hope I answered your question about small dick.

    But yeah….I dig your blog bro. I’m still seeking ways to use the technology They so Merrily Give Us….against them. and yeah…there is a They. Not a cabal of fat, chuckling white men in a board room caressing globes carved from lapis lazuli…necessarily….but….

    Thank you very much for the insightful and heart-felt piece. Very robust stuff.

    Valor,
    Robes

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    1. Robes:

      Thanks for sharing. You have some interesting thoughts.

      I think men, with some exceptions, place more significance on the penis than women do. I think many men equally place undue significance on women’s breasts. It’s my subjective opinion, so I don’t have any psychological or social data to back it up. Having grown up ultra-skinny, “flat-chested”, and brunette I experienced a lot of rejection from males. They made it quite clear that I just didn’t “have it.” Ah, well.

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  3. Incidentally Mr. Park…my apologies for the vulgarity. I consider myself a Christian..but I do tend to use a lot of profanity. It is not always the most effective means to communicate….but as far as the clinical anatomical stuff…I don’t consider that profane….just sad & clinical. But in any event….I don’t wish to really antagonize anybody with harsh language that does have purity of spirit. I was recently reminded that Omar in The Wire…did not use profanity. And if any recentish character was the epitome of a modern Jesus chasing the money-changers out of the temple…it is Omar.

    Valor and Fellowship,
    Robes

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  4. Let’s be real. Asian phenotypes have never been attractive on men to people of all ethnic backgrounds, including their own. As an Asian woman, I largely prefer the looks of white men who have naturally broader shoulders, more interesting hair colors and textures, more eye color and shape varieties, bulkier musculature, etc… I’m not saying that Asian men are ugly, as some are very good looking, but those who look good generally do so due to their Caucasian-like features. Your typical shorter, lankier male, with small slit-eyes or unmanly doe-eyes, is hardly masculine and does not project that look of confidence that women look for. We want to date and mate with a man who can protect his family, not another soft feminine person who looks like they’ll cower away with its tail between their legs at the first signs of danger.

    I know I will be thrown pitchforks and all for what I just said, but this is a very uncomfortable truth that nobody seems to admit. Most just try to avoid their seemingly “white worship” by saying things like “love is love”, or “I don’t want to feel like I’m dating my brother”, but the truth is that Asian men just don’t look like men. And it’s too bad for them, but the reality is that there is very little they can do.

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    1. Thank you for your honesty Jenn C. Have you considered that your preference of white features might be coming from decades of mental colonization? Dominant cultures tend to set themselves as standards of normality and even beauty. For that reason, Africans in some countries like Jamaica and Nigeria now bleach their skin. I don’t blame them, commercials on TV and magazines portray light skin as standards of beauty.

      In my country, women with big sizes used to be the standard of beauty. There’s even a proverb about light skinned women; mukadzi mutsvuku akasaroya anoba – a light skinned women, if she’s not a witch then she’s a thief. With colonization and media, light skinned women are now the standard of beauty.

      You might want to ask yourself why you really prefer white men; is it because they’re really more handsome than Asian men or it’s because you want to be white or you have been taught at an early age white men are the standard of beauty? Again, I understand beauty is a preference, there’s no standard for preference. And I can’t say your preference is wrong. However, our preferences are a reflection of our worldviews and should prompt a serious introspection.

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      1. So what if it is? Survival of the fittest is not only in the animal kingdom. White men have a more attractive “mating ritual” and have more physically appealing features overall, so it’s natural that women of all ethnic backgrounds are more attracted to Caucasian-looking men. Now I might be just talking about myself, but this is a statistically measurable fact. Keep in mind that proverbs are just words written by people who can’t genetically compete, so they channel their anger/jealousy into words.

        There is a reason why certain ethnic groups have more dominant cultures than others. As superficial as it may sound, being objectively attractive plays a huge role in establishing its dominance. Therefore White men are factually more attractive than Asian men. Likewise, Asian women are one of the most desired demographic in the world because we embody what men look for the most in a mate. As much as there’s very little Asian men can do to make themselves a more objectively attractive demographic, there’s also very little Asian women can do do make us an objectively less attractive demographic. It goes both ways.

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        1. LMFAO! Literally, all of your cuntspew boils down to “I’m a typical whore for whatever demographic happens to be the dominant force in the society I belong to”.

          There’s literally nothing beyond that, in spite of your hilarious attempts to bring kindergarten musings on evolutionary biology into the framework.

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          1. What is this? Trying to be me? You can always try…

            If being attracted to a dominant force of society makes me a whore, then I guess a sizable quantity of Asian women are also whores. But at what point will you start to realize that, maybe the problem is not us, but you? If there was only a small quantity of Asian women who refuse to date Asian men, then the problem will lie in their preferences. But the fact is, most Asian women (and even some Asian men) look up to white men as a standard of attractiveness, be it in appearance or in status. And when all effort to push against the trends fail, it’s perhaps time to accept the state of things that cannot change. Asian men unfortunately have more unattractive features compared to men of other racial makeup.

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          2. Jenn You’re the biggest dumbass I’ve seen yet, the phenotype thing you brought up definitely made some sense but going on about how asian women are so great…..yeah i dont think so, you’re all hella ugly too. But the thing is men, specifically white men, tend to not care how butt ugly you guys are. So you actually have a chance outside your race fortunately for you. Women on the other hand are much pickier when going for men, plus i remember hearing about how WMAF married couples don’t do to well either. And you guys do go after white men because you’re pathetic really. I mean you single out that race to go after because you wish you could be white yourselfs, essentially selfhating whores. Now that’s the fact. You can like white features but at the end of the day you’re generally just selfhating whores. Asian women are disgusting on the outside and inside but it takes a white man who gives no shits to deal with that. Have a good life

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          3. Moron just the some go go bar hookers from Thailand and the Philippines would go for some fat disgusting white male. Every other ethnic group has proven that the males marry out more than their females.

            According to statistics from every white nation

            Arab males marry out more than Arab females

            Bangladeshi males marry out more than Bangladeshi females

            Turkish males marry out more than Turkish females

            Indian males marry out more than Indian females

            Persian males marry out more than Persian females

            Pakistani males marry out more than Pakistani females

            Algerian males marry out more than Algerian females

            African males marry out more than African females.

            Literally just some desperate women from the far east and that too the desperate far east people since I’ve seen the East Asian women who are not from a background of prostitution stick with their own men generally. Also Mongoloid people from what I’ve seen have this attitude to follow orders from a government a lot more. They do anything to please the state. Now if the state is the Chinese government, then they please them for some reason and if its America, then its white males since they have this foolish idea to follow the crowd for some reason.

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        2. There is literally no chance that you’re an Asian women. You’re retarded ranting screams of your typical lonely white male who visits Stormfront on a daily basis in order to convince himself that his worthless life has meaning. lol

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          1. First of all, what is Stormfront? And second of all, I’m not the one who’s unable to find a mate. So whatever you say, yes my life may be easier simply because I was born Asian and female. Call it the way you want it, but I won’t apologize for being born this way. If you were born into an advantaged society (like into royalty or wealth), you’d exploit your privileges as well so don’t think for a second that you’re any different. You’re just upset that I’m speaking the minds of countless other Asian women who have to hide behind a veil of political correctness just to avoid hurting your feelings. We don’t belong to Asian men, so we’ll date, sleep with, and marry who the hell we want.

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  5. Hahaha 85% of white males are obese and have disgusting faces. The best looking guys in the world in my opinion are mediteranean, brazilian, and some of those northwest looking guys from India that have those bollywood looks for example Hritik Roshan, other than that, there is really nothing special about white features. Also Asians aren’t bad looking people on average you’re a lot more fit and age better. You just don’t have confidence for some reason.

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    1. Most Asian men are ugly as sin. All my 3 sister (who are Asian) would never even consider dating or marrying them.

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  6. Please do not preface with your comment with African American women that was actually a punk move and comment. If you are speaking on Asian issues speak on that because as an African American I understand the forces that are at play in this country and the constant battle, hostilities, and jealousy that are targeted at black women. Black people cant have dark skin but others literally die to get dark skin through tanning. Blacks have a natural tan. My beautiful black sistas cannot be curvy, but others are spending thousands of dollars to get butt, lip injections for what they naturally have. So when you say statistically, please check your source and your messenger. If it is a white women source or male, please miss me with that. I think both print media and Hollywood has shown it is not a shortage of beautiful black women. In addition, the most successful interracial couple is the black female and white male combo, check the stats.

    The reason African American women are targeted is that they are one of the most educated, outspoken groups in the U.S. (that includes my mom whom is a general practioner (MD) and two sisters (one an engineer and the other a nurse). Blacks are not the “model minority” because we will speak up both the educated and uneducated, lol. When they say Asian guys are unattractive then that is what they are saying. However, when it comes to African American women, same old propaganda dating back to when that “great white man” could not help himself for wanting to dip in the chocolate pond which is why you have all these light-skinned people and that white wife could not stand that black woman for her husband indiscretions.

    So, I did not care for your “along with African American women” because as an African American MALE married to an AFRICAN AMERICAN FEMALE who is not fat, ugly, nor uneducated your comment was unwarranted. I can almost guarantee you if my wife had written this article and it was dealing with black females, she would not have even thought to mention an Asian male or anything else.

    I have no respect for any group of people that puts another human being on a pedestal due the melanin or lack of in their skin. I have also observed Asian women with white men, and it is sad because white men do not give them the same respect that they would a white or black woman for that matter because SOME (not all) of these Asian women are worshipping them, the same as with Asian men, a white women could be the biggest whore and her own man not want her but an Asian man will kiss her dirty undies that is why so many white women will take a foreign man when their own men will not accept them. Those women eventually show their true color and play these guys and treat them like dirt. There is one such couple in my neighborhood; Asian guy working like a dog and the Mrs. is flirting with every Harry, Bill, and Larry on the block. I have dated my share of white women and to some extent can speak on this because most were ones I met in the club or in college and gave the appearance of being wholesome but was quite the opposite. Not saying ALL, but I dated a good number and that was the case. Asians allow themselves to be treated like dirt. Food for thought: Anyone you can walk on, you will always embrace as being OKAY!

    It is really sad that is why I stay away from some foreigns because their behavior is sickening until they face the same racism that they would like to participate in but at the end of the day, “the white man” reminds them you are not white. It is funny because a man is just a man. If you do not have a history in this country, you fail to realize that fact because some other countries are so poor that they buy-in into whatever propaganda is pushed.

    It is so sad when other cultures come to this country with their ignorance. Same God created me, created everyone else. It is because I recognize my greatness that they like to vilify me but at the same time envious of everything I am and represent. Before you respond, please take a class on American History, the Civil Rights Movement, and the African diaspora before you come to me with some nonsense, like you understand race relations in this country because if your folks were not here building this country from the ground up, you can stay mute. I do not totally agree with Steve Harvey, but African American women are not checking for Asian guys nor are some white women. I had to toss my hat on the table on this one because I love my beautiful wife, and I am tired of stats. published by white people attacking intelligent, strong, beautiful black women that happen to my mom, sisters, coworkers, etc.

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    1. Thanks for your thoughts. Besides the fact that I disagree with nearly everything you said in regards to Asian-Americans, in regards to your first point: for the stat about African-American women, I was citing the very same statistics that claimed Asian-American males as the least attractive demographic (you can check the hyperlink in the same sentence). I wasn’t just singling out African-American women or pulling such trivia out of left field, which would be offensive and rather racist of me. Of course, you may take it up with the algorithm of the statistics itself; I believe that if they are true, they reveal how awful the westernized culture really is. This statistic points to a larger problem with American culture: the ridiculous and unfair bias against minorities in terms of “conventional attraction.” I happen to think the bias against Asian-American men and African-American women is both real and unacceptable. On that it seems we agree. Whether we agree or not though, I appreciate the discussion you offered.

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      1. Wow, jenn c what candor, and the dude who was upset at the stats re: black – African American women, nothing of what you said did I comprehend, though I did try. I’m the villain here per se but I doubt that i would appeal to jenn c. Though I’m white the tall, broad shouldered, full blond mane, and other desirables are not part of my repertoire. Just blue eyes but my incredibly attractive black(she prefers that over African American) wife likes those & she even puts up with my baldness and lack of manly musculature, yep I’m scrawny. Now regarding my wife the first time I saw her the world literally stopped, she was and is the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen, dark skin that sparkles in sunlight, broad nose, thick lips, and hair not like mine ( the little I have), and to this day since 2010 and at 48 she still takes my breath away every time I see her. So I am part of a growing minority who does not believe black women are on the bottom of that list! And given some time I’m sure that list will be irrelevant for others too.

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    2. You could’ve been a little less crass there, my man. I’m black, too, but I see nothing here from this writer that warranted condemnation. Maybe some more explanation, for understanding purposes. But, so far, he’s kept a reasonable tone of dialogue going.

      At least JS Park is SPEAKING about something regarding these type of issues. Many people don’t even do THIS much. If something’s not perfect, just point it out. I feel you went a bit far in insulting Asian guys. I’m also not sure it’s true that white women are preferring or fleeing over to Asian men, as much as you may think.

      Also, I’ll just say, your comment about how many Asian men “will kiss her[white women’s] dirty undies is a bit much. Especially since you can easily find some black men who do the same–every seen the Kardashians and Jenners? Mandingo, Inc.

      Anyways, we can talk about nuances and share differences in opinion and views, without approaching a “taking a swipe” zone. I feel that human relationships overall would improve if only more people know how to communicate better.

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  7. Hello there. I am biracial myself (black and white), I married an asian woman and have two sons. I find myself being worried lately on how my sons will look like when they grow up and how difficult will be for them in the dating scene. I’m having nightmares where I cry to them asking for forgiveness for chosing their mother, she is pretty and have a great body, because of this I sometime wish they were girls cause everyone knows AF have it easier but both of them are boys #*@^. I can only hope that taking them with me to the gym and teaching them how to dress properly will save them for a future dating life failure

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    1. LOL

      Hilarious that in every topic on asian males, inevitably an asian female will crawl out of the woodwork & try to highjack the thread with her “Here’s 10 reasons why i love white guys!”

      Seen this with every forum, or comment section everywhere

      What do these self hating idiots do all day other than trawl the internet posting comments on topics (asian men) that she already despises?!

      It’s like, they (obviously) don’t want Asian men or anything to do with them – but they also don’t want women of OTHER races to do the same, as well.
      It’s like they piss on the inside AND the outside warning off other races of females. LOL

      Sad actually, self hating, mentally sick fuck ups

      PS the last laugh is at Asian women.
      Sons from WM + AF will on average look far more asian looking than sons from AM + WF.
      Because biologically, the gens from poverty, garbage genetics of asian females will contribute more (have greater weighting) than genes from the (white) male
      So doesn’t matter how big, tall or how white the guy is. LOL
      Son will mostly have physical traits taken after his asian mom:

      – flat, pancake face, Asian skull,
      – neotenous, harrmless looking (not good look for men)
      – ugly, recessed midface, no angularity
      – weak
      – narrow frame, small boned
      – short
      – unathletic

      Sucks to be you (and your sons).
      Just google “Nicholas cage son”.LOL
      His son is 1/2 white (with Korean mom). But looks 100% East Asian. LOL

      Will also be a mental fuckup with psychological problems
      (like Eliot Rodger & other serial killers/shooters. LOL
      (at best will be a useless, worthless waste of space that no girl wants, neither Asian or white)

      LMAO

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  8. As further evidence, the first character that popped into my mind when I first started reading was Dong Nguyen from Kimmy Schmidt. Because he is an Asian-American male who kisses a white female. But, of course, the whole show is just one big stereotype after another (which makes me laugh – uh oh) so I don’t really think he counts. So then I thought of Minho, also played by Ki Hong Lee in Maze Runner. He doesn’t get to kiss a girl, but he is does get to be Asian-American and awesome without ever having to have an accent. He was also my favorite character, so of course he came to mind.

    Anyway, I don’t really think I’m adding anything to the discussion here. Just wanted to say thank you for sharing your perspective and your experience, especially as it can be a very painful one. I could never ever in 100 million years know what it’s like to be an Asian-American man, because I am not an Asian-American man, but now I can understand just a bit more how my actions, biases, comments, and media consumption affect the experience of Asian-American men.

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  9. Theres no point of this article because I don’t know why Asian americans are trying to sound like victims .You Asians don’t go through racism the way black people do. And to jenn.c who said Asian women are pretty,that is a big lie .You guys all look the same ,like the way your men do. And .I think you guys should just be content with your karate master role cause that role fits you guys, it will be weird seeing an African American as a karate master ,just the same way it will be weird for you guys in romantic Hollywood scenes cause of the unattractiveness of your people .

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    1. Anonymous, pompous, and ignorant. Not a good look for you, guy. I’d hope you live with personal sense of shame in life about your deplorable character, but you probably don’t.

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  10. I didn’t read the article thoroughly and here’s why:

    Asians playing victims in America sounds like a real joke to me. America is a white prevalent country and you’ve been all benefiting from it. And isn’t that why you or your ancestors moved to that country in the first place? Yeah, sure, America is a land of immigrants yada yada yada. And native Americans are like, Asians?! So make Asians a face of a blockbuster movie and make Asians movie stars!!!! Haha. Are you kidding me?

    Black people were segregated and couldn’t even take a same train with white people. Black people fought to death against white people, and still some of white people are mocking black people, for, say, their slavery history, which is not a joking matter at all. Compared to that, Asian people pretty much have comfortable life in America. Tangible discrimination was everywhere but not like that.. This article only amplifies Asian stereotype. Yeah, take an initiative to be on a media is like a real struggle. Hey, are enough black people on Hollywood movies as a leading role? How about fat women? I mean there are some movements to make plus size models a mainstream, but do you actually believe it’ll work?

    So it looks like this: no fundamental human rights are violated but greedy Asians want more. Because now they can afford it. Give us fame and give us pride by “making us appear on American movie”. Ironic, isn’t it? Because somehow, more Asians on American movie will make hunger disappear and third world countries less poor and more developed. AIDS will be cured and all criminals will be wiped out and earth will get a grip, once again. Sounds wonderful, isn’t it?

    Don’t make me involved in this thing. I’d like to go after for real cause. There are still, thousands of people who are suffering from indignity and unfair treatment.

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    1. I can see the points you’re trying to make, and I appreciate some of the intent behind it, but your delivery could be better.

      I don’t think this writer merits any condemnation. He’s carrying a dialogue in a rational manner.

      And even if the problems touched on here aren’t all quite on the same level or tendency as for other minorities–even if that’s truly the case–one can STILL talk about those problems.

      I would agree with his main point, such as how “unattractive” Asian males are commonly viewed as and generally aren’t preferred as faces in the media.

      I would just prefer his set of problems than my own (as African-American, as America’s most feared guy in the room). But Asian-Americans have problems, too.

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  11. “It’s why Ryo Oyamada, a 24 year old Japanese college student, can get run over by a police car in New York, and the officer goes free and no one chants in the streets.”

    Did Asian-Americans RAISE a fuss? Because other minorities like African-Americans will RAISE a fuss about these issues, giving no rest until their voices are heard–or, at least, noticed.

    It’s why most modern Civil Rights got modeled after the African-American civil rights movement.

    I agree, that this is incredibly sad that a young man got killed and saw no justice or outcry, but I don’t remember their being a publicized major outcry among the Asian community from it, either.

    The “chants in the streets” today are simply because it’s taken other minorities like African-Americans over FIVE centuries to even get THIS far. One can point to, say, Obama’s success as becoming President, but then one can also point to how Trump was half of America’s immediate strong response as the anti-thesis to all things perceived “Obama.”

    If I wanted, I could point to how, during the 1960s, while African-Americans were looking for civil rights, Asian-Americans (while, still discriminated again) were already gaining status as “model minority.” Not something that many Asian-Americans appreciate, but then again, being the highest-paid group of Americans (all while other minorities continue to fight for financial progress) isn’t helping.

    The “invisible” nature of Asian-American society certainly isn’t right, but I could think of worse social issues to face than being positively stereotyped as smart, rich, and almost “white.” I’m not saying it’s right. It’s not. But I can certainly think of worse fates in this world.

    At least Asian society is generally “second-place” socially and financially to white people’s “first place,” while African-Americans and Hispanic Americans still fight for better opportunities, and while 18 of the 20 poorest nations on Earth are Africa (thanks to colonialism breaking its back).

    In the end, though, I wish all minorities could live as freely as white society does–who, at large, don’t even understand what it’s like to be NOT white in this world. It’s not easy being treated as “under” someone, for centuries.

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    1. I hope this comment doesn’t duplicate–the first time I submitted it, I didn’t see it appear immediately.

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  12. Asian men’s experiences with dating are rooted in ugly cultural tropes. Today, Asian Americans are boxed in as “technologically proficient, naturally subordinate” nerds who could “never in a thousand millenniums be a threat to steal your girl,” as “Fresh Off the Boat” creator Eddie Huang put it in a New York Times piece last year. As early as the h century, their ancestors were already being portrayed as sexless, feminine “others” by the white majority, said Chiung Hwang Chen, a professor of communication and media studies at Brigham Young University-Hawaii.

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  13. One of my favorite movies, Short Circuit II (1987), features an Asian (Indian) character as the lead. However, in a few moves that have NOT aged well, they chose a white actor (Fisher Stevens, in dark face) to play the role. Also, a lot of the laughs are also based on malapropisms as Fisher Stevens’ character Ben misstates basic English idioms. Overall, though, Ben is portrayed sympathetically and three-dimensionally, and his romantic interest in a white woman pays off at the end of the film. Obviously it would have been a much better film if they’d cast an actor of Indian descent in the role, and relied a bit less on malapropisms to keep the humor faucet running.

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  14. asian in america are weak and slave in gen , their ancestor like to run out of problem in motherland . (like south vietnamese , korean , japanese …) that is why they weak , ugly and loser .

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  15. Asian cultures recently in history did not mix their DNA enough – especially China.

    interbreeding like rabbits has now left you with nations full of similar bland cookie cutter cloned people.

    yes it is true Asians are not attractive this goes for men and women.

    to JENN C just an FYI asian woman are not the most attractive female demographic in the world give me a f$cking break hah!

    the reason men and especially white men go for Asian woman is because they know you’re easy to bed. They’ll f$co you then kick you to the curb.

    and that’s exactly what you deserve.

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