Occasionally we let someone in, we open the folds of our insecurity and give access to the darkest parts of us. We hand over the key, and it’s terrifying. And sometimes they bump into a raw nerve, they say a callous insensitive remark, they ridicule a strange notion we have, they poke at our dreams just a bit. It hurts pretty bad and we push them out and fold up fast. We remind ourselves, “This is why I don’t let anyone in.” And we run.
It’s right here that most people apologize like crazy. They feel terrible. They were trying to figure out how to navigate the labyrinth of your wonderful story. It’s like holding a tiny flash light in a cave of a new world. They didn’t mean to provoke those old wounds. They didn’t mean to poke fun at your dreams. They considered it an honor that they held the key, even for a few frenzied moments.
Intimacy takes work, trust, wounds, hurts, sculpting in the dark: and that takes time. It takes more than a single chance. Of course we can close the doors, at any second, when we know it just won’t work. But there are many opportunities if we had trusted a little longer, reset the tempo, and spoke up louder: it would’ve been okay. Bridges would be built. New stories are made. You find your hand closing around theirs. They begin to traverse the folds of your heart with ease, and they learn to say those things which give life, which give freedom, which grow dreams. Intimacy is formed out of stumbling, but further down the path: there is so much light, so much laughter, so many steps to the horizon together.
4 thoughts on “Navigating The Labyrinth.”
Deeply profound and well-expressed, J.S.
Thank you my friend! Recently a friend offended my passions and they were pretty sorry about it. But I knew it wasn’t malicious or on purpose, and we all do things like this that we need grace for.
It makes me think of the many people who have betrayed me, but if they had come back I would have wept with joy. Are they too ashamed, afraid, arrogant? Am I not worth a little humility? Am I too scary? And then I am drawn to what people do to Jesus, refusing True Love. And I am forced to see when I let my Saviour down.
Hey, you’re taking me way deeper than I wanted for just reading a blog, my friend.
Reblogged this on Who Is Maria? and commented:
I totally loved the words. 🙂