Skip to content

J.S. Park: Hospital Chaplain, Skeptical Christian

From Devout Atheist to Skeptical Pastor: A Blog For Busted-Up, Beat-Down People (Like Me)

About / Bio.
Books.
Featured Posts and Lists.
Speaking.
Podcast.

Day: August 30, 2012

I Want God

“I want God, not my idea of God.”

— C.S. Lewis

Originally posted here.

Share this!

Facebook
Twitter
Tumblr
Reddit
Print
Email
More

Pinterest

Like this:

Like Loading...

Posted on August 30, 2012September 7, 2012 by JS ParkPosted in Christianity, Church, Culture, Life, Ministry, Religion, TheologyTagged CS Lewis, quotes. 2 Comments

Facebook:

Facebook:

Top Posts:

Through the Fog
How To Cut Someone Off The "Christian" Way
Ugly Asian Male: On Being the Least Attractive Guy in the Room
I Hate My Life and Myself and I Want to Die: What Do I Do?
About / Bio.
All I Did Was Survive

Follow for Free Content

J.S. Park’s Bio:

My Instagram #typewritertherapy

With one of my fellow chaplains Sam. Also I don’t know where I’m looking. #chaplain #sushi #icantsee

Sometimes words or encouragement or sitting with someone is not enough. Depression is that insidious. It doesn’t play fair; it has no rules, rhyme, or reason. It doesn’t respond to life even at its best. “Reach out to someone because you never know” is not bad advice. But simply being kind to someone is not enough to stop an avalanche. It’s a drop of water in a desert. It’s not as if enough words will suddenly activate a lever that stops depression in its tracks. It shouldn’t be on family or friends to find a magical threshold, as if the right amount or combination of words was ever going to help. Being a presence, to be there for someone, is always enough to give—but it may not always be enough to save. You may not feel adequate enough to help someone who struggles with depression, but that was always true: you can’t be enough all the time. We cannot cure terminal, and some sorrows only get healed by heaven. That’s a terrible, awful, unfair truth. But God forbid if I ever go that way, I hope you will be released from the guilt of thinking that it was up to you somehow. When I enter that fog of depression, I’m always aware this might be it. This might be the one that wins. I wish I could tell you that your prayers and messages and books and casseroles and pizza dates and medicine and therapy and holding my tears will get me to the other side. So far, it’s worked. One day, I don’t know. I hope to God it will keep working. For one more day, I hope so. To experience your love and laughter and kindness is still worth it to suffer this fog. #typewritertherapy #mentalhealth #depression #faith #hope #encouragement #suicideprevention #suicideawareness #life #love #typography #lettering #jspark

Here’s a weird thing. I’m finding that some of us who grow as humans are tempted to judge others through the grid of our own growth. Growth ought to help us understand each other more, because it says “I’ve been there.” Instead it’s used to say, “You’re way behind me.” So often when we grab onto a new idea, it’s easy to stomp on others who don’t know it yet. This includes me. I start to think, “You’re not being an active listener. You’re not being mindful. You’re not doing self-care. You’re not sitting with my grief.” All those ideas, by the way, are absolutely valuable. But they’re meant to help us connect with each other. They’re not meant to play “gotcha.” It’s unfair to blast somebody who‘s never learned those terms. Or maybe they’ve been looking for those terms their whole life, and you’re the only one who can help. When I speak or teach or write, I get worried that an idea will get weaponized. My bullet points become bullets and points. But your own growth should never be used to condemn, coerce, or cancel anyone. It’s always, always, always to connect. I suspect some of us use these ideas to look good. And using therapeutic language to flex is no different than being hyper-religious or pseudo-rich or an armchair coach. I absolutely endorse therapy, psychology, and self-help. I can’t recommend therapy enough; I’m still here because of it. But it can’t be wielded recklessly. It requires caution, wisdom, and humility. It must be a mirror. That isn’t only true of therapy, but true of religion, leadership seminars, Buzzfeed lists, the latest celebrity guru, bloggers, and YouTubers. Sure, they are helpful. It can feel great to learn “insider language” and to understand those thoughts and feelings which didn’t have a name before. But to impose our own journey onto someone else is abusive. Trying to force someone into a sprint only leads to busted knees and soles that bleed. We can point the way for each other. We must move alongside. #typewritertherapy #encouragement #psychology #empathy #connection #therapy #jspark #faith #typography #lettering #selfcare #boundaries

Recent Comments:

	ccole48 on Through the Fog
	sparkythejesusfreak on Through the Fog
	yet i will rejoice \|… on The Two Kinds of Faith: Warrio…
	Christine Goodnough on To Wait, To Hurt
	Reformed Shooters? \|… on Why I’m No Longer Self-Identif…
	leftnfree on Still You Are
	JS Park on Lessons I Learned from Leaving…

Tumblr:

Twitter:

Subscribe to my YouTube Channel:

Search Bar:

Search for:

J.S. Park’s Podcast RSS:

Spoken Word: Friday / Saturday / Sunday - Death, Doubt, and Deliverance
3 Habits Every Married Couple Needs to Know | Marriage & Faith - J.S. Park
Do the Abused Need to Forgive Their Abuser? About Boundaries for the Traumatized - J.S. Park
From Atheism to Faith: Discovering the Hidden Story of Humanity - J.S. Park

Support:

Featured on Editors’ Top Picks of Wordpress, March 10th 2017

Featured on the Front Page of Wordpress, December 16th 2015

Freshly Pressed: November 6th 2012

Social Media:

Facebook
Twitter
Instagram
YouTube

Meta:

Register
Log in
Entries RSS
Comments RSS
WordPress.com

Calendar Archive:

August 2012
M	T	W	T	F	S	S
« Jul				Sep »
		1	2	3	4	5
6	7	8	9	10	11	12
13	14	15	16	17	18	19
20	21	22	23	24	25	26
27	28	29	30	31

Follow for Free Content

Join 6,310 other followers

Pages:

About / Bio.
Featured Posts and Lists.
Podcast.
Speaking.

Recent Posts:

Through the Fog
To Wait, To Hurt
Still You Are
Believe It
Lessons I Learned from Leaving My Evangelical Church
Thank You, Friends
I Signed a Book Deal
The Three Hardest Words
Stand Against, and Stand For

Blog at WordPress.com.

Send to Email Address Your Name Your Email Address

Cancel

Post was not sent - check your email addresses!

Email check failed, please try again

Sorry, your blog cannot share posts by email.

%d bloggers like this: