I feel stuck and feel like I have no direction and calling despite my education. I want to trust that God has a plan for me, but I cannot discern a specific heart or calling for anything. I feel like I’m wasting this life he’s given me. I don’t know what to do.
Good news, my friend. Welcome to the real world.
I don’t mean to sound callous here, but don’t panic: you’re not experiencing anything different than the other billions of human beings in the world who aren’t sure what to do with their lives. That sort of Limbo-Floating at any stage in life is expected, and though that might not be comforting, you’re NOT crazy.
It took me about seven years to graduate college, and I went to three different ones for undergrad (two of them community colleges, both which were great: so don’t let anyone tell you otherwise). I changed my major roughly three times — Undeclared, Biology, English, and finally Psychology. And as I was on my way to being a doctor, I got called to seminary. By this time I was in my mid-twenties. So it took a while to “discover” myself.
The important thing, firstly, is to not feel bad about feeling bad. If you feel like you’re “wasting your life,” then don’t start wasting your life on wasting your life. Unless you’re shooting up heroin and beating up hookers with a spatula, you’re probably exactly where you should be: seeking.There will be some anxiety, but you’ll need to run through that like a giant stocking.
Don’t allow self-pity to poison you. The Victim Syndrome gives you permission to feel sorry for yourself, which is a counterfeit guilt that opens the door to laziness, excuses, and sitting on your rear whining. Please don’t be that guy.
If you’re not sure of any one thing, then try everything. I didn’t stop looking. You can’t either. Everyone has their own rate of growth, and just as I was a late bloomer, it might take you a bit to find sure ground. Do NOT compare yourself to other people who might be moving ahead: you are your own person so pace yourself. At the same time, don’t use “pacing” as an excuse to be a sloth.
Look back on your life. Journal entries, videos, pictures, anything. Think back to when your passion was sparked. Most people say, “Nothing interests me,” and while that could mean you haven’t found it yet, mostly it means you haven’t paid close attention. God has specifically wired you with gifts, talents, and dreams to chase something for His Glory. If you think back, it’ll help you to think forward.
Most of all, pray. Pray like crazy. That’s not legalistic. Once again, as I’ve said hundreds of times before, effort is NOT legalism. Beg God for a vision. But be careful: He might explode you right out of your seat when you least expect it.
Look forward to what God is doing in your life. It’s an exciting time: you get to find you in Him. “Be confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”